Woke up some minutes past 10,
Haven't gotten out of bed since then,
It's almost noon time,
I have sent a few text messages,
I have called a couple of people,
Asking them about me,
Why am I feeling low?
What am I doing wrong?
And I sent a text to-many,WKK6PSR34FNH
I needed their words,
Like I need breakfast,
I am hungry now,
It's noon already,
I haven't had breakfast,
If they could send me good words,
Tell me I am beautiful,
All I do is beautiful,
I will feel satisfied and energized,
And go back to doing what I do,
Be what I am,
Travel to what I want,
But even with all those words,
Those beautiful words from beautiful women,
I still feel I am empty,
I am hungry,
I can't just close my eyes in this bed of mine,
And imagine I am eating breakfast,
And hope to be satisfied after a few minutes,
I know their words are real,
But somehow like Headlines change with time,
What was news yesterday might not be today,
What I did beautifully yesterday might not be today,
I might have been beautiful yesterday but not today,
We are a progressive world,
Isn't that why we rate countries in line of development?
I know the words these women send their way are pretty,
They are real,
But somehow I feel they are not current,
Mostly to me,
I cannot be seen to be stagnant,
Stagnant is depressing,
That's the truth of the matter,
Just the thought of diving out of the swimming pool,
From the shallow end to the deep end,
Then to a river,
Upstream a river,
Makes me feel more rejuvenated than words sent my way,
I need beautiful words yes,
But inside me they are nothing,
Unless backed up by my swimming upstream.
Their is nothing good about exposing insecurities,
For a fraction of a second it's okay,
But when it becomes too much,
We all notice I am a fake,
Isn't what you talk about most what you are?
Isn't what you think about most what you are?
I can't let myself turn insecure,
I am holding someone's hands,
I am not sure where I am going,
But I am feeling insecure where I am,
Insecurity sometimes is a way of telling,
A beautiful person that they need to move,
And all beautiful people are confident,
All confident people are beautiful,
Insecurity is like your skin,
That tells you it is cold you will get sick,
So that you wear your jacket,
Or go somewhere warmer.
Unless of course it is paranoia.
